Hi,
This is an old original I had never posted here, because I wasn’t really happy with how it sounded. I remixed it and now I’d like to know what you think about it. I’m pretty sure there are a number of things that could use some revamping at the production/arrangement stage (drums and bass starting too late, for starters), but I’m not sure I’ll have it in me to start this all over again… Just wondering if it is worth it.
Anyway, here it is:
This sounds fantastic. Great performances, sounds and mix. Love the reverb on the vocal, and the acoustic guitar sounds - they are really gorgeous. Vocals sounds pretty amazing too. Very cool effect around 1:33 - lots of ear candy here.
I like the way the arrangement builds from 1:41 in the second verse, and the clavinet (?) sounds.
My thoughts are that I wished for the drums to enter sooner. I would suggest cutting the synth solo that goes from 2:50 - 3:12 - it feels a bit superfluous to me - kinda like noodling without going anywhere…
Here’s my suggestion for an edit:
Obviously it’s rough and ready, but I think it creates a more focused dynamic arc for the song structure. I also think the “don’t twist the knife” refrain could be brought back in later in the song - perhaps as vocal ad-libs over the outro solo.
Very nice work - definitely worth bringing to fruition! 
Yeah i am digging it. I would agree with Andrew regarding the cut at the beginning, I disagree with him on the other part i would keep the 2:50 to 3:12 and get rid of the part from 3:12 to end and replace it with the chorus, twist the knife parts. Either way it sound good, just personal preference. I would also go a little drier on the vocals in the verse sections, the rest is great.
Wow that is some invaluable feedback guys, thanks. Drums and bass starting too late was obvious to me but the rest of your suggestions will definitely be great to work with. I agree with making the song shorter although I’m still not sure how to do this the best way. Going back to the chorus is probably a good idea as well.
I was actually shocked, listening back just now, at how much reverb there is on the verses, I can’t believe I let this slip after mixing. I am also wondering if the vocals might be a little loud sometimes?
Also, what about the bass? It was played on a keyboard with a fender P bass sample that is ok but obviously playing on a keyboard doesn’t allow a realistic human performance. I have a bass but it is a cheapo low-end Yamaha and my bass playing skills aren’t good enough to play what I did on the keys I’m afraid.
Thank you so much, your feedback really helped me regain momentum on this song.
I like the bass you have on it. It kind of sounds like a stand up bass to me.
This tune sounds great! I’m getting a bit of a Supertramp vibe at times.
I love the way you used the keys/ synths. They add so much extra texture and interest. The acoustics sound great too! The voice sounds smooth and polished.
The first slight negative that crossed my mind was that the vocals were a bit too bathed in effect…But even with that large amount of effect your voice stood out nicely! I’m not sure if that amount of effect is such a bad thing. At first I thought so, but many people would love that reverb bath. Me mentioning that, is being a bit nit-picky.
This tune sounds really well produced! I’m listening through my modest AKG K-77 headphones, plugged in to my laptop…And I’m a bit buzzed on wine. 
I had a very enjoyable listening experience with this one. I really don’t know if you should change anything. I’d hate for the song to end too quickly.
Great job!
Thank you Wicked, that’s really nice to read. I’ll take my time and try different things until I find the right moves to make with this song.
Stay safe and enjoy your wine!
The Supertramp comparison is pretty accurate. I enjoy all the synth leads especially, although the acoustic guitar and bass made for a solid underbelly.
Vocals were fine with all the reverb to my old ears. They were clear and understandable throughout, and yet they didn’t feel too up front in the mix.
Overall a very good arrangement for a soft rocker, dude. You aren’t trying to compete with Stairway to Heaven, after all. It does remind me of From the Beginning by Emerson, Lake and Palmer but a tad softer. Very easy to listen to!
Haha, I guess you can’t hide your habits and influences… Supertramp and ELP are among my favorite bands. In my view this song is largely influenced by “From the Beginning”, as far as the arrangement is concerned.
Thanks for the nice feedback!
I have now decided what to do with the song and am currently working on it, and it involves a collaboration with one key member of the IRD community… 
I love Supertramp! They wrote so many great songs. Seems strange to me how people view Pink Floyd as this all-time great, classic band and Supertramp are hardly ever talked about. I definitely prefer Supertramp over Pink Floyd. But I do really like some of the songs on Dark Side Of The Moon…especially Time/ Breathe. That is a stunning classic song/ songs.
Sounds great, I like the percussions. Is it a conga drum or a Tabla? Perhaps the treble on those can be boosted just a bit more or might need a bit of pitch tightening.
This sounds perfect!
If I would change anything is bringing the vocals effects a bit down at the beggining and raising them later on the song.
Also agree with ColdRoomStudio about cutting out the part 2:50 - 3:12.
I also wondered about the bass if it is real or not (beacuse I record midi as well most of the times) but I couldn’t tell. Sounds very natural to me.
This is top notch work.
They’re conga drums, I think there are bongos as well if memory serves. Thanks for the tip!
Thanks @ManAbyss, appreciate it!