Thanks for the bash gang...done with this..ha ha

I have implemented many of the suggestion from yawl and thank you for that. I have come to dislike it because of the number of times I have messed with it.

I will be the first to admit this song is a mess. I started with a riff and built as I went. I’m three days into it. I know it isn’t a chart topper, but it was fun to do. I’m 68 now and keep thinking “it’s the end”, so every time I produce a song, I feel, well, not so old. ha ha

Was wondering if the bass following the riff works better than the one that comes later after the bridge that just pounds away…or whatever I did there. Also the drums are just a couple I found in EZdrummer.

If you find it even a little entertaining I would be happy. The guy gets messed up and dumps his gal, later to have second thoughts. thanks for listening

Sincerely

Paul

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nice. reminded me of Jerry Lee Lewis for some reason. 68? Shoot. Jerry was still rockin’ strong at 68 lol

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Thanks for listening Jon. I will most likely change it daily now for awhile. No pressure or hassle. Pick up the guitar and try to come up with something a little different.

sincerely

Paul

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only thing I was going to comment was maybe throw a bass fill in instead of straight copying the groove in the verse. seems ripe for bass fill

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That was fun to listen to for sure! It’s catchy. I guess I have a couple of comments:

The vocal to me is pretty inconsistent. There are times when it sounds great, and others when it sounds either too weak or too loud. You might want to use compression or just put some volume automation on the vocals so that they sit at a good level throughout the song. An example of “too loud,” for me is around 1:33. And an example of “too weak” is when the vocal fades out around 0:50 on “no more.” Maybe that was intentional, but it stuck out to me; I notice it happens several times throughout the song.

The other comment is something about the lead guitar tone that first comes in around 0:06. It sounds kind of like a swarm of bees to me. Maybe it’s a little to piercing or something? Just for my taste, anyway.

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Hey Paul - Very fun song, and overall I like the performances. I agree with Cristina that the vocal levels are inconsistent and jarring at times, something that can be easily remedied. The guitar riffs are cool, somewhat reminiscent of J.J. Cale’s (and Clapton’s cover of) “Cocaine”. The guitar tone is a bit ‘sludgy’ sounding, could be crisper and punchier, but personally I kind of like that tone for some things, including this.

Yes, and I think there’s an opportunity there to add some really interesting reverb or flanging or something, a weird effect, almost like a dream sequence. It seems like this is the “bridge”, and a ‘reflective’ point for the lyrics. The ‘echo’ thing there is cool. Some effects (reverb with very little pre-delay especially) could tone down the vocal prominence too … though you probably will need to take down the level just a bit as well.

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I’ve been feeling like I’m close to the end since I was 15 years old. :cold_sweat::grin:

This is entertaining. You’ve still got it !:grinning:

I’m just listening with my laptop so I can’t be sure of what I’m hearing as far as the mix goes, but it sounds like the vocals are a little to separated from the music. Maybe bring the vocals down a bit and apply some compression so that they sit better in the mix.

Rock on Paul !

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Hey Jon I did copy that first bass sequence. I first played it and then found a four count that my timing was the best and just hit “D” for duplicate. Good suggestion. Thanks

Sincerely

Paul

Hi Cristina. I have been thinking often of that cover vocal you had up awhile ago. Blew me away. Ok, yes the vocal is messed up a bit. What I do (that is most likely not cool) is break the vox track in places where I see the pattern small and boost it by guess. ha ha That is how I roll unfortunately. I will try the compression thangy. I run my guitar through a Boss 70 and then through a LA 610 and then into the box. I never can find a good setting for a great rock sound. I am very tempted to just get a good stomp box for a better tone. I also played this on my PRS, I am going to crank out the Gibson today and do some experimenting. Glad it is raining so I can hit the studio. Glad you found it a tad catchy. thanks so much

Sincerely

Paul

Rockin’ track Paul! This is one of the most fully realized recordings I’ve heard you make! You’re definitely improving with leaps and bounds… there’s life in the ol’ dog yet!

Here’s my suggestion for the mix: Try pulling some 400hz out of your guitar sounds - It will make a BIG difference to the clarity and bite of your guitars… I guarantee you’ll immediately rachet up the ROCK quotient by a minimum of 50%*

*Guarantee for emphatic illustrative purposes only - not valid for any monetary exchange.

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Hi Stan I remember when I played with our band how I had some great stomp boxes and my Fender amp (twin reverb maybe?) I got some great sounds back then. going to research a good rock box.

I am going to try some effects where you indicated today. It’s funny, I think studio one has some of those. In the past I have just relyed on whatever was used originally. I know it has a thing called ampire. I will check.

I know when I mixed it down, it said I was 6db over, so yes the mix is a mess. that is why I don’t worry until I get some feed back. I had my hearing tested and am pretty deficient on many frequencies. Forum help is so cool.

Thanks Stan

sincerely

Paul

Hi Mr W ha ha I always have had enough confidence, but reality does set in about one’s age at some point. This song does not fit my voice at all. You need a rougher style than what I gave. I wasn’t allowed to sing in our band except for harmonies back in the day. Thanks for the nice thoughts

sincerely

Paul

CRS Wow, so glad you said that. It’s crazy when you get this age and you don’t feel it. I know how to use some EQ, but have never tried a specific frequency. I usually just grab the line and take away most of the stuff under 150 etc. I will experiment with that today. I am amazed that you can hear that. thanks for taking the time

sincerely

Paul

The final two cents. Just wanted to say thanks for the folks that took the time to help me with this song. I don’t have the chops to do many of the things listed like notch out in the 400 hz area( I tried and took too much) but I did hear all of the things that were noted and and can’t figure out why I didn’t hear them myself the first time?? Still working on the end of the song cuz it sucks. It was a fun experience and now time to head out to make another. You guys are great

Sincerely

Paul

Hey Paul,
wooh… this is sounding cool!! Listening through my stereo speakers and my feet are tapping away… I missed the first version, from your post I’m guessing this is the revised mix? Wooh… you are smokin - great stuff. You’re sounding like a band now, things are heaps tighter and it’s a cool song. Go boy… GO!!

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