I had a completely different version of this song from last year, but it just didn’t resolve that time musically. But I liked the general song idea, kind of light pop rock and semi romantic lyrically. I admitted to my wife I used her covering up with a blanket in the AC on hot days in the story. She hasn’t heard it yet, so please let me know what I have going on. Is it too simple? Sound too much like something else?
By Steve Bancroft
It’s a hot day in the sun
It’s a hot day in the shade
Let’s all have some fun
It won’t rain on our parade
The forecast is all clear
A little wind, that’s all
So float with me, my dear
And beam your beautiful smile
And if we go outside
The sweat will leave us soaked
On hot days you must take
Some precautions around here
Our goofy hats prevent sun stroke
And everybody has a cooler near
Full of ice and drinks and cokes
Gatorade, water and beer
The thermostat in the TV
Says it’s ninety degrees outside
At nine o’clock in the morning
It’s a good day to get fried
We have no reason to leave
So we’re not going anywhere
So I’ll turn the AC down for you
Covered up in your easy chair
It’s a hot day in the shade
Why don’t we stay inside
Some fun can still be made
That cannot be denied
We’ll watch a double feature
Order pizza, not give a care
And I’ll turn the AC down for you
Covered up in your easy chair
Another interesting musical journey from you. The vocals need to be pulled up and the guitars down to bring the song together more coherently. Thanks for sharing, I look forward to hearing where this goes.
I will try that, Eric. I didn’t fiddle with the track levels all that much, and I agree they could stand some finessing.
This particular arrangement was not the first, and the guitars did get more galloping by this one, and pretty loud pretty fast. I actually had cut out the synths in spots to add to the dynamics, and I think I can tweak the guitars so they build up to the gallop so to speak for drama.
And your comment about the vocals arriving over the intro is interesting because the bass line is exactly that guitar intro repeated throughout the entire song. Weirdly that worked, but I am contemplating what you suggest in some fashion, Vaughan.
Thanks, guys, for those comments. Hopefully the next version will be a little better for them.
I am not a great singer, so I try different things experimentally and hope for the best. And welcome, Dallas, and thanks for the comments and listening!
But this version has the vocal level up a few dbs, also has thinned out the instruments and copied the intro riff in a couple other places. This means there is still a lot of the “galloping” guitar but not all the time.
I think this is already a noticeable improvement, almost a random improvement. Thanks!
dude , when the vocal isn’t in it - the arrangement is really cool, the melody is now pulling it down… can you totally go all moroccan / led zeppelin / kashmir VERSE with it? (the vocal melody)…it barely needs a chorus or even a resolving lyric - just a middle 8, for this one.
Hi there. I didn’t read the others. You have a great vibe/sound here. Very unique. You must lose the lyrics and the vocal and come up with something completely different. Make it as far out as the background music that you made. So, to me there is very good and quite bad in here.
For me, Paul, these lyrics were akin to James Taylor on some songs, a bit too hokey but over time are accepted by sheer familiarity. Of course, I’m not riding on the coattails of my fame and talent, hehe. So my tale of very hot summers in Texas and how we imagine going outside but end up watching TV in the AC is tenuous. It does have some cliche verses, going on about the weather and the wind and on, and even the punch line is underwhelming.
But alas, the words and vocal melody precluded the vibe/sound of this version, so it is not easy to lose that. I have always wondered about all the hit songs that have weak and silly lyrics, and I recognize the truth behind those who say words are not necessarily important. So for me, I tend to try to make them matter and feel some guilt when they feel more like filler. It is always nice to eat the cake.
As usual, I am listening without reading any comments so I don’t generate any bias.
Ok, so there is a bit of imbalance with some of the instruments going on. The guitars are great, vocals and bass seem to work pretty well overall, but something is making the mix rise and fall quite abruptly and dramatically.
Initially I think it is the drums. They are very quiet and then when the vocals and keys (is it keys?) come in, things just go a little wobbly.
I’d suggest, when mixing, try bringing in one instrument at a time when starting a mix, just to get levels. For this song, start with setting drum levels and have them peak at somewhere between -6 and -10 db on your master meter. Then bring in the bass and balance the two so they sound good together.
Then I would bring the guitars in (Left and Right) and again, check to see if you can hear the bass and drums clearly still. Is one the new instrument too loud, or can’t be heard enough.
Repeat this over and over with each new instrument. Bring it up so it can be heard, then check and every other already introduced instrument to see if you have now obscured any.
Then you will have a nice balanced mix, you can teak as the song progresses or as any issues arise.
As a song, I actually really like it. I’ve listened to it three times while typing this and it’s got a lot going for it. I love the character you bring to your songs. There’s a real sense of joy and creativity in your music that I like very much.
Ahhh…now I’m reading through the comments and see you’ve done newer versions!
Ok, off to hear them…
There’s a funny tonal thing going on with the vocal (not your voice), like there’s a honky frequency that could be pulled out a little. I’d also compress or automate your vocals a little more as some words come out very loud and others drop off.
Interesting changes. Sonically much better.
Good stuff! You’ve worked hard to turn this around! Well done.
As a naturally bad singer, I do drop off or get too loud and then have to fix that after, which I’ve done to some degree, but I do hear where it needs to be smoothed out. I’m not sure about the honky tone, Dan, but I’m at a point where I’m trying to find a happy place for the vocals. They are close for me now, but it is so tempting to try something more.
I’m glad you liked the song, too, especially the last version. It did improve thanks to everyone’s honest observations. Sometimes I think I could come up with all the fixes by myself, but strangely I don’t always do. Help is much appreciated!
As a naturally bad singer, I do drop off or get too loud and then have to fix that after, which I’ve done to some degree, but I do hear where it needs to be smoothed out
Perhaps not naturally bad, just not as well trained as you’d like. You are most definitely NOT bad to listen to. I wouldn’t listen three times if you were. Once would be plenty. In regards to volume, do you use much compression? Outside of that, volume automation (which you can do visually to an extent just to see where the really loud or really quiet parts are) would help a lot. But it is getting better.
I’m not sure about the honky tone, Dan, but I’m at a point where I’m trying to find a happy place for the vocals
Yeah it was odd. There was a section where it just sounded a little strange where a frequency cut would clear it up a little. I am not one to just be able to name the frequency, but it wasn’t a huge deal either.
They are close for me now, but it is so tempting to try something more.
That’s a killer! If I had a dollar for everytime that went through my head. I’ve learned now, only recently and around 24 years into making music, that I need to just move on quicker. Don’t settle, but know your limitations and keep pushing on, or nothing will ever get done!
Thank you for your kind review! Now your song: before I listened to the song, I read the lyrics. They might not always rhyme, but the important part is that the lyrics are heartfelt; she should like that! I am guessing the lyrics are personalized, which is good. OK, now I am listening to your latest mix. I have probably stated this before, though your singing reminds me of Roger Waters (not a bad thing since Pink Floyd is one of my favorite bands y’all). As often happens with me (with many songs by various people), your song sounded quite a bit better on the second listen. My wife is the AC junkie, and I’m the one that gets cold easily. The song has a kind of happy carnival atmosphere that I like; nice melodies. I find it interesting how the guitar and keyboards mesh together in a nice way. Nice song, I think she should like it! The song made me smile.