Unsaid, Undone

Unsaid, Undone
0

#21

Whoah, yeah never heard Phil play like that!.. Sounds a bit like Weather Report…Although after listening to that stuff, my songs are Mary Had a Little Lamb-simple by comparison.


#22

Thanks Paul - I appreciate the listen and the comments - cheers!


#23

This is really cool, great playing all round. I love the syncopation between the guitars in the first verse and some sweet chops at the solo. Acoustics guitars sound impeccable and the bass performance is also a standout.
I’m not sure if that harsh snare is working for me, the amount of bottom wire just seems a bit too much within the context of the track, and I felt the kick is a bit too pronounced at 4K, and could quite as easily cut through the mix without all the click in a more transparent way. All just personal taste of course.
Nice job.


#24

Thanks Terry - I think I’d like to massage the kick and snare a little more. I’ve gone with a fairly low-tuned snare on this song, which is a bit different for me, so may have to work it a bit more to get a handle on it. Thanks for chiming in - I appreciate the comments.


#25

Cool song, great arrangement keeping it interesting. It’s sounding great on my meager monitors. The guitar tones are luscious and I really like the subtle strings filling out the final section of the song. The guitar solo is really tasty but through each listen there seems to be one note that pops out at me. Right at 2:37… the note that starts the final fast run downwards, jumps out tonally… and that’s really reaching to try and find something to bash on! Really nice work.


#26

Thanks Jamieson - Glad you noticed the strings! The decision to add those came fairly late in the process, but the song seemed to be wanting something like that. I actually have a violinist friend of mine lined up to add some real strings to the mix, but we’re both super busy, so I’m not sure we’ll be able to find a time that suits us both… we’ll see…

That note… yeah the choice of note could have been better. It’s a weak note in the scale landing on a strong note in the rhythm, which is not idea… Maybe I should have played it twice!:wink:


#27

Nice job Andrew. I, too love the tone on the guitar solo. It has nice air and bite at the same time, and space around it. Kind of a hollowbody sound to it. I read above about your “limitations as a singer”, and kind of got a chuckle out of that. You’re a great singer. I do hear a couple of small spots where the weight of the vocal performance could match the music a little bit better, but it would probably be a note by note surgery. The mix is pristine, and the song flows very well. In fact, I kept my guard up for your usual jolting chorus, and I’ll have to listen again to see if I missed it.


#28

Thanks Bob - I appreciate the comments! Yeah, no jolting key changes this time, just a weird half-time chorus and a full speed verse!

The lead guitar used here was my '95 Fender Lone Star Strat set to the front pickup.


#29

ColdRoomStudio,
Thank you for the recent review! Now your song: the audio quality is rather good. Instrumentally, everything sounds very good. Most of the singing is quite good, though I thought some parts were a bit pitchy (usually the higher notes were culprit); that is my only significant gripe. Speed reading through the comments, I didn’t notice anyone else saying that, so maybe it’s just me. It did sound better on second listen.


#30

Thanks for listening and commenting, Aaron.


#31

Sounds great on my speakers. Great guitar tone. Great tune. Keep em coming!


#32

Thanks Charlie


#33

I listened a couple of times just now, Andrew, and it is a great song which might not have a strong enough hook to become a hit. It has all the technical t’s crossed and i’s dotted (I personally do not think the vocals are too low in the mix as a) I can understand every word perfectly and b) turning the volume way down to 2 and 3 I hear the vocal and guitar first and c) the super clean tone and range and somewhat low degree of busyness isn’t stepping on the vocals), but I feel you may have overused that one jazzy powerchord on the guitar. To me it is adding an unnecessary monotonality to the chord progression which detracts from your more melodic vocal line. I really like how you slide into the major chord, but the jazzy chord then comes back to dominate everything. Obviously I am no expert, so I hope you understand what I’m trying to say.

I also never noticed the strings until it was mentioned, so they need more prominence, I’d say they should take the front and let the guitar sit back a little.

So would any amount of minor tweaks make this song a hit? It is possible. Your voice is like a well-behaved Roger Daltry, and the song has a Who-like complexity that is respectable. Who knows, switch out the jazzy guitar on a verse with an acoustic and/or strings (which would simultaneously spotlight your singing) so that the big crescendo is bigger and make the strings carry the song idea in the outro, and you might have that hit.


#34

Sounds fantastic! Intro is kind of unconventional and just jumps right in. Good growl on the bass. Drums clear, punchy and driving. Fabulous sound (and solo!) on the guitar solo at 2:30. I didn’t really have problem with the level of the vocal either. This sounds just so well balanced and just all around slick and solid! When I grown up, I want to mix like you. :grin:


#35

Wow Steve, thanks for the careful listen and thoughtful analysis!

To be honest, I never really thought of this track as a “single”-style production… I mean, I always try to make my songs as catchy as possible, but right from its inception, I was thinking “album track” in my approach to the arrangement and production. I felt the harmonic structure might be a little too “out there” for most tastes.

Still, it’s really interesting to hear how other listeners perceive my music. In my mind, I think of the verse chords as being slightly “indie” voicings rather than “jazzy” ones, as they have quite a bit of dissonance going on via ringing open strings. However the chorus Cmaj7-Cadd9-Cmaj7 riff does strike me as more traditionally “jazzy”, and (to be honest) that always bothered me more, as I didn’t want the track to descend into lounge-ish cheesiness. It almost walks that line now - to my ears, at least.

Ultimately though, I’m pretty happy keeping it as an “underachiever”. My fear is that, if started pushing it too much in a “single/hit”-direction, I might end up losing the essence of what I actually like about the song, which is its “mongrel-ness” :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

Regarding the strings: While I prefer the strings to be subtle, and to be “felt” rather than “heard”, I have an idea where I’d like to repeat the string part after the song finishes as a kind of a “post-reprise”. I may wait until I can get my friend to add some real string parts to the mix. In the meantime, here is the stings solo’d (It’s the “mockup” I sent to my friend).

Thanks for listening and commenting - You’ve given me a lot to mull over - Much appreciated!


#36

Haha, thanks Mike.