Bash my song for my wedding

Bash my song for my wedding
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#1

Hello, my name is Ryan! Here is a song I’ve been writing for my wedding. It’s called Moment. It’s a surprise to my fiancé. I have three more days haha Please let me know what you think!


I Wrote A Song for Ryan's Wedding
#2

I’m Clowpenis.fart, good to meet you.

I really dig that drum sound, very natural. Pretty cool song, I’ll bet your lady will really dig it. If I had to make suggestions I’d say that since the drums are so rootsy and dry, I’d tone back the reverb and delay on the guitar. Particularly the lead guitar. I’d also do a little EQ shaping with them, maybe drop them at around 3kHz? We’ve been talking about this great new EQ called Equivocate that can match the EQ of another track, and it sounds pretty badass on its own. I’d recommend using that if you’ve got an iLok. As for performance and tracking I’d say that the part at 1:22 where you got the harmonies going, and add more, or get more singers. They sound a bit weak as of right now, I’d overdub the living shit out of them. That’s just me though.


#3

Listening on earbuds at the moment. The fact that you’re taking the time to write a sing like this for your wedding will likely be a special thing for your bride. And congrats!

One thing that stands out at the moment, at least on the chorus, I’d bring down the guitars a bit so you can better understand the lyrics. If this is a song for your wedding, then the vocals/lyrics are the star of the mix and they need to be present and clear. Guitars could come up later as the song builds and it will also create some song dynamic. That’s my 2 cents so far. Again, congrats!!


#4

It’s nice to meet you, too, Clownpenis.fart.

Thanks for taking a listen. I’ll tweak the lead guitar a bit. In the past I’ve overused reverb haha You’re right, the backing vocals around 1:22 are pretty thin. I’ll try to fill it out some more. I appreciate your feedback!

Apparently, EQuivocate is being given away for free, until October 31st! https://www.eventideaudio.com/promo/equivocate
I created an iLok account, just to claim it. I’ll look into the USB dongle, sometime.


#5

Thank you, I’m very excited (and nervous)! I’ve been scrambling to finish it up haha

Okay, I’ll try bringing the guitars down in the chorus. Yes, the vocals do need to be the star of the show. I’ve been pretty shy about mine being front and center. I’ll try to make the song more dynamic. Thank you for the feedback and kind gesture!


#6

Happy to do it! Keep those tunes coming in! :beerbanger:


#7

Sounds pretty cool, Ryan…

Just want to re-iterate what has been mentioned above about the vocals. Some of the softer words in the first verse, like “…gaze at me” just tend to get a little lost - automation can help there.

The guitars are pretty biting, particularly the lead guitar. Maybe try some complimentary eq, cutting the rhythms where you want the lead to poke through. That will also help the lead vocal stay out front.

CPF’s lush vocal layer suggestion is a good one - if you can make the time to do it, it would really enhance the production IMO.


#8

Hey Ryan! This song is super cool!!! I love the style…totally Juliana Theory, Jimmy Eats World, 311, Getup Kids. OMG-if that doesn’t bring back some high-school memories (I’m in my early 30’s), then I don’t know what does!!!

Here’s my thoughts on the mix. Lets start with the drums. By talking about drums. The first thing I noticed about the drums is the biggest problem in the mix is the guitar tone (funny as that sounds). You can tweak the drums and bass until you’re mouse batteries die, but it won’t make any difference because the guitar is so bad its distracting. At first listen, the drums and bass sound rather pleasant. The kick very very well balanced between your sub frequencies, the scoop you EQ’d a 500-800hz is PERFECT, and your beater hits clearly in the 2-3k range. I actually wouldn’t touch that. I like the way its compressed (it sounds as if you may have run the kick and snare through the same compressor because they attack and release times on the kick/snare bus comp are interacting flawlessly). Whatever you do, DON’T CHANGE THAT. Also, brilliant job, timing the gate release on the Hi-Hat. There is a question of weather the Hi-Hat and overhead mic are EQ’d and leveled correctly. Are they too bright/dark and are they loud enough? I don’t think we’ll know the answer to that until you get those guitars under control. Because they’ll change everything.

I think there’s too much reverb on the rack and floor tom.

Also, I don’t know why that poor drummer showed up to record with only one cymbal? Its a damn shame, because his tone and performance solid. But since thats apparently what you have to work with, I’d pan that cymbal dead center, and and see if you can compress and saturate just that cymbal on the choruses when he’s slamming on it to give it a little more sustain. Try compressing with slow release settings to keep it sounding natural but keep it somewhat transparent.

I’m happy with the bass, but would consider pushing it just tiny bit louder. I do like the tone, and the performance really suits this style.

The lead guitar (the one that’s doing the single note riffs) is too bright and doesn’t have enough body at 800hz and 1k and 1.5k. If you shave off 3-5k subtly, I think that will help it a lot. Also, you may want to consider throwing an -1 octave pitch effect on it using a parallel channel, then blending it maybe 15-20% into dry channel. You don’t actually want to hear the -1 octave, you just want it to help make the lead guitar sound more beefy. That’ll help beef that thing up without it sounding like Frank Zappa or Iron Maiden.

On the rhythm guitars, it would help me offer some broad solutions if you can tell me how you tracked them. Can you walk us through the signal chain, and the processing chain inside the DAW?

In that second verse sort of thing “Some say I’m lucky, I call it blessed”, I would have mixed those aaaah open vowels with a little more air and placed a slight modulation effect on them. You want to bring out air by scooping your mid lows and applying a hi-shelf. starting around 7k. But you shouldn’t need to de-ess those because there aren’t any ‘s’ or ‘t’ consonants. If you compress them you can then bring them down in the mix but still have them present. Right now, I think they compete with the main vocal more than they add to it.

I can live with the way the lead vocal is mixed. Its quite natural sounding. You sang it good and clean, and when you hit it with your autotuner you cleaned it up pretty good. I didn’t hear any sour notes. Hope this helps.

And CONGRATS ON YOUR WEDDING!!! :smiley: :smiley: :smiley:


#9

Hi Cool intro guitar tone. The tone of your voice is great, a little flat tho. No biggie tho. You can get up there man :slight_smile: Didn’t read the other posts, but your voice has to shine thru in the chorus a little more. Your voice in the high register is perfect now. Just that start i guess??? Certainly not a ballad that I expected. Well you didn’t have to make brownie points because she already agree to marry you. ha ha I wrote a wedding song that I thought was pretty good, but it never found a home. Congrats on this track on your wedding and thanks for the review on my last song.

Sincerely

Paul


#10

Hello, Jonathan! Thanks for taking the time to critique my mix. I’m glad it could take you back to high school :slight_smile:

I shall tinker with the hi-hat and cymbal, thank you! I used electric drums+Addictive Drums 2 for the sound. The ride cymbals I have just didn’t sound right, but I’ll see what I can do to diversify the cymbals and provide some more sustain.

I’m happy to hear you like the bass track! I’ll try to bring it in a little more. I just got the bass guitar last year, as my old budget one was crapping out.

Concerning the guitars, I’m using Pod Farm 2 for both lead and rhythm. On the lead, I have recorded a -1 octave part for the single-note riffs. Perhaps I need to balance it a bit more. On the rhythm, I use warmer tone settings. I have a Strat with S-1 Switching, and use that. I picked an amp model for both, and adjusted the settings to my liking. Knowing all this, what kinds of suggestions do you have for them?

I’ve recorded some extra background vocals during the second verse to fill it out some more, and will experiment with trying to get more of an airy effect. Thank you for your kind words about the lead vocals! I don’t have Auto-Tune, and was concerned about being on-key. This helps my confidence, as I’ve always been shy about my vocals :confounded:

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen and provide help with this project. It means a lot to me. Once I have more time, I’ll upload a revision. It should be soon!


#11

Hello, Paul!

I’ve been concerned about the opening vocals haha It sounds “okay”, but I recently got sick. I hope I can re-record the parts that I need to. I’ll try to get the vocals to shine through some more. Thanks for listening and for the feedback. This is a great community, and receiving invaluable support is greatly appreciated.

Regards,
Ryan


#12

Hi Ry, I like this and I think you’ve done a great job here, the average listener will think professional. The comments made here are good though and I wouldn’t argue with any of them.

The thing with guitar levels and tone is personal preference really. If you use a reference track to compare with, as is often mentioned here, and you check your mix on different systems you probably already have a pretty good idea of what you want.

And vocal confidence is always an issue but it seems no matter who you are someone is going to love it and someone else is going to hate it so you might as well just put it out there! Good work.


#13

Did you commit the overdrive and amp sounds to track, or can you still go back and change them?


#14

So is it today then?


#15

Sorry, everyone! I’ve been in “married mode” haha I accidentally had the mix in mono, which worked out for the better at the venue, actually. Attached is my final stereo mix. I’d like to invest in some other amp modeling software. Has anyone tried Line 6 Helix Native Plugin?


#16

Sounds like she’s already taken over your life. You must assert your male dominance. Those backing vocals sound much better!


#17

Congrats on the wedding & the song!

Haven’t tried Helix, but I can thoroughly recommend this one:
https://www.scuffhamamps.com/product/s-gear


#18

It’s inevitable! Eventually, we’ll have kids, and I’ll be in “dad mode”. Thanks for checking out my revision :slight_smile:


#19

I shall look into it, thank you! I’ve been wanting to try something new, for quite a while.